Recorded live at a five-day retreat with Thich Nhat Hanh, sponsored by the Community of Mindful Living, September 1st through the 6th, 1997, in Santa Barbara, California. Tape number TNG4, a Dharma talk with Thich Nhat Hanh. Dear friends, today is the 3rd of September, 1997, and now is the Dharma talk for the young people. Here is my right hand. And I'm looking into it. And as I continue to look, I see my right hand contains also my left hand.

[01:02]

First, I think that my right hand is different from my left hand. But as I continue to look into it, I can see that the left hand is inside the right hand. Strange. My right hand, I know it has the capacity of writing. I have written a lot of poems with my right hand. You don't see the poems, but you see my right hand. And if you look deeply into my right hand, you can see poetry inside. Strange, but it's true. And my hand is not proud of it.

[02:07]

But my hand, my right hand never tell my left hand that you are good for nothing. You never wrote a poem. Every poem, I wrote it. My right hand never said it's such a silly thing, because my right hand has the insight within it. I remember one time when I tried to drive a nail into the wood. My left hand is holding a nail. My right hand was holding a hammer. I wanted to have a nail on the wood in order to hang one of my paintings.

[03:17]

But I don't know why that morning I was not very concentrated. Instead of driving the nail, hitting on the nail, I hit on one of the fingers of the left hand. And my left hand got hurt. It was bleeding. At that moment, my right hand immediately put the hammer down and took that finger into it and tried to make it feel better. And my feet naturally began to walk into the direction where I could find something of the first aid in order to make a bandage for my finger.

[04:21]

My feet and my right hand did all these things without anyone telling them to do. And after a few minutes, my finger, the finger of my left hand, felt much better. It did not say thank you to my right hand. It did not say thank you to my feet. Because my left hand felt that it was one with my right hand. It was one with my feet. So no word thank you is needed. Strange. When someone does something for you, helps you a lot, and yet you cannot say thank you because you see that you are the same with the other person and you don't feel the need that you have to thank anybody because you are one with the one who has helped you.

[05:26]

Strange, but that is true. My right hand knows that it has written a lot of poetry, but it also knows that without the left hand, it will never be able to write poetry. Because my left hand has done many things that the right hand did not do. And so my left hand and my right hand feel that they are one. My right hand never had the feeling of being superior to my left hand. And my left hand never had the feeling to be inferior to my right hand. Because in both of them, there is a kind of wisdom, of insight, that is called the wisdom of non-discrimination.

[06:27]

Nirgvipa Kampasana. The insight that you are neither one nor two. With the other. You are two, and yet you are one. You are one, and yet you are two. Sometimes the word one is helpful, sometimes the word two is helpful. So you are not caught in either word, either one or two. When I look into my hand, and if I look deeply, I can see this is the hand of my father also. Strange, but that is true.

[07:30]

Because what am I? I am the continuation of my father. But this body has been transmitted to me by my father. And this hand is mine, of course, but it is at the same time the hand of my father. So I now see things more clearly. This is my hand, this is the hand of my father also. So when I take good care of my hand, I take good care of my father's hand. Meditation can help you to see things like that. And then, as I continue to look, I see that this hand is also my mother's hand. Yes, this is my hand, but this is also the hand of my mother. You know something? My mother has passed away a long time ago. But she is still available to me at any time I want her.

[08:38]

It may sound strange, but to me it is very real. I remember when I was a little child, I had a strong fever. My throat was burning. I was so thirsty. And yet I did not want to eat anything, to drink anything. I suffered so much. And suddenly my mother appeared. And she put her hand on my forehead. It's so wonderful. It's so wonderful, the hand of my mother. When you have a fever, when you suffer so much, when your body is like on fire, and your mother's hand is something like the dew, a flower, fresh water,

[09:47]

and as she touches me with her hand, I feel almost all the suffering in me is gone. How wonderful is the hand of a mother. When I grew up, I had to live away from my mother. And finally my mother passed away. And I thought that I had lost my mother forever. But one night, I woke up at midnight. I was sleeping in a small hut on a hill, covered with tea plants.

[10:50]

I woke up at about one o'clock in the morning. And before that, in a dream, I saw my mother. I saw my mother, very young, very beautiful, smiling to me. I woke up after that. And I walked into the tea garden. And the moon was up there, beautiful, shining. And I felt that the moonlight is like the love of a mother. And I suddenly found myself embraced by the love of my mother. And the first time I realized that my mother had never died. My mother is always alive in me. And not very long after that, I had a fever.

[11:56]

I had a fever. By that time I was already a monk, having practiced many, many years already. So I, one day, while lying on bed, I brought my hand up and looked at it. And looked very deeply into it. And suddenly I realized that this is also the hand of my mother. And breathing in, breathing out, I brought the hand of my mother up to my forehead that was burning because of the fever. And there the miracle happens again. It was exactly the hand of my mother touching my forehead. And I felt exactly the same kind of experience. Most of our suffering was gone because I was touched by the hand of my mother. And from that moment on, I knew that this hand is also my mother's hand.

[12:56]

And my mother's hand is always available to me at any time I want. So today I would like to ask you to draw a hand. Your own hand. If you draw with your right hand, then you draw your left hand. If you are left-handed, then you draw your right hand. You draw in such a way that people can see your mother's hand, eat your hand. I know this is difficult, but I am confident that you can do it. You raise your hand. You draw your hand, one of your hands.

[13:59]

But you breathe in and out in such a way that while drawing your hand, you draw also the hand of your mother at the same time. When you hear the small bell, please stand up and bow to the sangha before you go and practice. When you hear the next bell, please bow to the sangha before you go out. Have a good day. Thank you.

[15:28]

I want to be sure that all of you hear me, so if you hear me, please raise your hand. Thank you. Thank you. My dear friends, when you practice breathing in and breathing out, allow yourself to breathe in and out naturally. Don't try to control your breathing. Do not try to intervene with your breathing.

[16:52]

Whether your in-breath is long or short, let it be like that. Don't try to correct it. Whether your out-breath is deep or shallow, just allow it to be the way it is. Do not try to bend, to force, to intervene. Allow your breathing to flow as it is. We have heard people talking about breath work. Now we are not working our breath. We don't say, my breath, please come here, I will help you to be the way I want. No, we don't do like that. We just breathe naturally. We breathe naturally. But while breathing, we pay attention to our breath.

[17:59]

It is like the children are playing, and we just turn on the light. We don't interfere with the children, we just turn on the light. So mindfulness is the light. You allow your breathing in and out to flow naturally. You just light up mindfulness in order to shine on your breathing. And you will notice that the quality of your breathing will be improved very quickly. This is very important. In the beginning, you notice that you are breathing in and breathing out, and your in-breath and out-breath might be like this or that, long or short, harmonious or less harmonious. Don't intervene.

[19:01]

Don't try to correct. Don't try to bend. And yet, half a minute or one minute after, you notice that the quality of your breathing will be improved naturally. And as you continue to breathe in and out like that for a few minutes, you notice that your in-breath has become deeper, and your out-breath slower. So that is why your in and out may become deep and slow. Breathing in, I notice that my in-breath has become deep. Breathing out, I notice that my out-breath has become slow. Deep, slow. We are not trying to make it deeper. We are not trying to make it slower. It just has become deeper and slower,

[20:05]

and we just recognize the fact. That is mindfulness. So we have that wonderful gatha for the practice of breathing. In, out, deep, slow. Calm, ease, smile, release. Present moment, wonderful moment. It means breathing in, I know I am breathing in. Breathing out, I know I am breathing out. And later on, breathing in, I notice that my in-breath has become deep. Breathing out, I notice that my out-breath has become slow. Deep, slow. Now the breathing has become more enjoyable, and the peace and the joy in me has increased.

[21:06]

I can stay with deep, slow as long as I like. And later on, I may realize that I have become more calm, and I feel much more at ease. Breathing in, I feel calm. Breathing out, I feel at ease with myself. No struggling anymore. Slow, calm, ease. Breathing in, I am able to smile to myself. Breathing out, I am able to release every worry that I may have. Smile, release. Smile, release. Smile here may be a practice of relaxation.

[22:09]

When we are not very relaxed, we are not very peaceful. In our face, there are maybe about 300 or more muscles. And when we are angry or fearful, these muscles are very tense. And if we know how to breathe in and smile, these hundreds of muscles suddenly become very relaxed, and we feel very different after one smile. So smiling here may be just a kind of mindful movement, a yoga movement, the yoga of the mouth. And after you smile, the situation becomes entirely different. You are totally relaxed. And you are able to release any kind of feeling or emotion

[23:19]

that is in your smile. And release, you get a lot of freedom. And then the last exercise of breathing is the most exquisite. Exquisite. Present moment, wonderful moment. Breathing in, I see myself dwelling firmly in the present moment. Breathing out, I know this is a wonderful moment. Present moment, wonderful moment. Most of us know by heart this song, but we shall sing again, one or two more times for our friends who don't remember, who don't know by heart the song, to know it, because it is a wonderful gatha, a wonderful poem for the practice. Let us sing together.

[24:21]

In a deep slumber Come ease, smile, release Present moment Wonderful moment In a deep slumber Come ease, smile, release Present moment

[25:23]

Wonderful moment This poem, you may use it during sitting meditation, very nourishing, very healing. You may like to use it in walking meditation also. And you may stay as long as you wish with one line, in, out, maybe five minutes, before you switch into the second line, deep and slow. You can enjoy any line of the poem as long as we wish. The same thing is true with the practice of sitting meditation. Of course, there is a sitting position that is more relaxing and stable, and yet we do not intervene with our body.

[26:32]

So, if we allow mindfulness to be lit up, and to be aware of our neck, our arms, our feet, and our back, suddenly everything will come right. We don't have to do anything. It is like we have a camera or a camcorder with the power for autofocus. You just open, and then it can focus by itself. You don't have to turn it to the left or the right. The autofocus is done like that very naturally. So you don't have to intervene with your breathing. You don't have to intervene with your body.

[27:33]

Just light up mindfulness, and suddenly your position will become correct. It is wonderful. Be aware of your position. Be aware of the muscles on your face. Be aware of your mouth. Suddenly your mouth naturally becomes smiling. Your muscles become relaxed, and your back becomes straight. Before, your head may be like this, but if you light up mindfulness, suddenly your head will be like this. Autofocus, autocorrection. You don't have to do anything. Mindfulness is the light shining on everything, and it helps everything to improve by itself. Let us talk about Cathy.

[28:40]

Cathy is sitting there on a bench. She is half asleep, half awake. She is being embraced by her fear, her sorrow. Suddenly she hears the sound of the clock. The sound of the clock. And after the sound of the clock, she hears the singing of a bird. She wakes up. It seems that the sound of the clock is telling her that paradise is here, available. So the wonderful sound helps her to wake up.

[29:43]

At first she does not believe that paradise is available. But when she opened her eyes, she saw the blue sky. The sky is so blue. She has never seen the sky like that, it's so blue. And it looks like the first time she is able to touch the sky that deep, she begins to believe that paradise is there, possible. Why?

[30:53]

Suddenly it sounds like an ordinary sound, just the sound of the university clock. Anyone can hear that sound. And yet, it's strange, that very sound, that ordinary sound, was able to wake her up and allow herself to touch the sky deeply like she has never touched it. And also, the white clouds. It's not a lot of clouds, but a few clouds in the sky. They are so white, they look like they are utterly free, floating in the sky. It seems to Cathy that it is the first time in her life

[31:55]

that she can see the sky and the clouds in that way. They are so beautiful, they are so peaceful. And there were three people walking in her direction. The people were dressed in a very simple way and were smiling. In the paradise, in a pure land, there must be Buddhas and Bodhisattvas and not regular people. But here she sees regular people, dressed in a very simple way, walking in her direction. All three are smiling and seem to be happy. And she suddenly thinks that it is possible that regular people can be in paradise. She looked at them, she said,

[33:01]

Where are you going? And the people looked at her and smiled. And they said, We are going nowhere. Why? You are walking. No, we are walking, yes, but we are not going anywhere. You know, this is the kingdom of God. This is the pure land. And we like to touch the kingdom of God. We like to tread the pure land. That's for our pleasure. You know, this is the present moment. And we would like to enjoy the present moment. Cathy was surprised. If she can take a picture of these three people in the present moment, that would be wonderful. So she began to take out her camera and to aim the camera at the three people. They laughed. Do you think that you can take a picture of the present moment? Why do you have to take a picture of the present moment? The present moment is everywhere.

[34:04]

And at any time, why do you have to take a picture of it? You take a picture only when you are afraid that you will lose it. You want to keep it as a souvenir for the future. You cannot take a picture of the present moment. You can only enjoy it and live deeply into it. And you know, the present moment is everlasting. Why do you have to take a picture of the present moment? That is silly. And Cathy was enlightened. She put back her camera. She thought that from now on she doesn't need the camera anymore. And she asked the three persons, Do you think that bodhisattvas and buddhas are here? Yes, they are here. But everyone else is here also. You know something? In the kingdom of God, in the pure land,

[35:07]

in the land of the unconceivable, there are all sorts of people. You can even find policemen here. You can find generals of the army. You can find soldiers. You can find alcoholics. You can find barbers. You can find teachers. You can find businessmen. And they point to you, the people who are sitting over there, the children who have been abused by their parents, they are also there. Those children who have been abused sexually by other people, they are also there. The ladies who have been abandoned by their husbands, they are also there. The gentlemen who were betrayed by their wives,

[36:14]

they are also there. You know something? In the pure land, in this kingdom of God, in this land of the unconceivable, everyone is there. Everyone has the right to be there. You can meet everyone. You can meet the Buddha. You can meet the bodhisattva. You can meet the generals of the army. You can meet everyone. Even you can meet the person you think you have lost. And Kati said,

[37:18]

I want to meet my teacher. I want to talk to him. I want to take his hand and to practice walking meditation. The people said, yes, it is possible. Kati said, my teacher is Shakyamuni Buddha. You know my teacher? He practiced. He sat under the Bodhi tree, the Pipala tree, and became a Buddha. I want to meet him. Is it possible? And they said, yes, of course, it is possible. Sit there, they said. This is an offering. The Buddha Shakyamuni used to come and sit at the foot of this tree. And Kati said that my teacher, he used to sit at the foot of a Bodhi tree. This is only an oak tree.

[38:19]

And the people she met, they laughed. They said, well, you know, over here, every tree is a Bodhi tree. You can sit down at the foot of any kind of tree and you can get enlightened, just like under a Bodhi tree, a Pipala tree. In this kingdom of peace, every seed is a diamond seed. You can sit anywhere and become a Buddha, anywhere. Every seed is a lion seed, because if you sit with stability, and that seed will become a diamond seed, a lion seed. Kati is excited

[39:43]

to know that it is possible to meet the Buddha, to hold his hand, and to practice walking meditation with him in this very land. She is about to ask in what direction she can go and see the Buddha. Suddenly she hears a kind of sound, the sound of a helicopter. It's strange. In paradise, there are helicopters also? No? She remembers that in the past, every time she heard the sound of helicopters, she was so afraid, because she had lived in a country where war was going on for 30 years, 50 years, and every time she heard the sound

[40:45]

of the airplanes and helicopters, she also heard the shooting, the bombing, and she experienced death and destruction. So at the sound of the helicopters, she began to travel all over, and she felt that hell was coming up from nowhere. Hell was coming, she knew. Hell. Fear, depression, death is coming. And she feels that she is not going to make it, to stand it, because she has had the experience of hell, and she now feels that hell is coming again. And looking at her,

[41:48]

the three people show a lot of compassion, and they tell her, don't be afraid, my friend, we'll be there for you, just breathe in and out, together we'll be able to embrace your hell, let it come, we'll be able to handle it together with you. So please breathe in and out with us, and you know that hell is not that bad. We are able, we are more able to hold hell within our arms, and to take good care of it. And you know something? Hell is very important. Because looking deeply into hell, we can touch our peace, our joy, and our paradise. So let us not be too afraid of the hell that is coming. So they hold her hand, they ask her to breathe in and out with her, and of course hell is coming,

[42:50]

but this time it is not overwhelming anymore. And Kati found it very strange that she is capable of holding hell, holding hell tenderly. She is so happy, she is holding hell, the hell that she knows so well, and from which she suffers so much, but now she is there, holding hell, and yet she feels alright for the first time. Never in the past did she have the idea the impression that she could stand hell, she could bear hell, but now she feels that she is strong enough, good enough, calm enough, in order to hold hell within her. Her happiness is not,

[43:53]

hell is not there. Her happiness is, hell is there, and yet she is capable of bearing it. And the three friends ask her to continue the breathing in and out, and continue to hold dearly the hell within her arms, supported by the three friends. She continues to breathe in and out, and she holds her pain, her sorrow, with mindfulness. Suddenly she becomes confident she is capable of taking care of her hell. Now, the friends told her to look, to look deeply into the pain that she is holding.

[44:56]

Dear friend, dear Kathy, please look into it, look deeply into it, and you see that it is not, it is not something that you cannot bear. And look deeply into it, and you see that your peace, your joy, your happiness is in there. If you are able to touch the seed of happiness, of peace, of joy in it, and then all the paradise will be yours. One of them picks up a leaf on a path. That is a red leaf just fallen off from a tree. And she was looking into it very deeply. And Kathy was surprised.

[45:58]

What is inside of a leaf that she has to look like that? She looked at the leaf as if in a leaf there are very interesting things. What are you looking for in the leaf? And the person told her, I see many things that are wonderful in the leaf. Do you see that? Do you see? Do you see the cloud, a cloud in this leaf? Come, come close and look. I see very clearly a cloud floating on the leaf. Do you see it?

[46:59]

And Kathy tried. And in fact, she saw a cloud floating in the leaf. Do you see the sunshine in the leaf? And Kathy is able to see also the sunshine. Can you see the earth in the leaf? And in fact, Kathy is able to see the earth in the leaf. And she continued. And she is able to see the whole cosmos, everything present in the leaf. And she understands now why it is so interesting to look deeply into a leaf. And the friend continued to look. Kathy, you know something? When I look deeply into the leaf, I can see the world of no birth and no death. I can see the whole paradise in the leaf. It's so joyful, so wonderful just to look deeply into a leaf.

[48:03]

And you know something, Kathy? You can look into a pebble. You can look into a cloud. And you can see as much wonders as you can see in a leaf. Here we enjoy looking deeply at things. Just looking can bring us a lot of delight and make us free. And when Kathy inquires about other people, she finds out that other people, when they wake up in the kingdom of God, they are helped by other people who are there. Even if you carry with you a lot of sorrow, a lot of pain, and if you know how to walk in the kingdom of God, you will change. You are walking with your sorrow,

[49:12]

with your forgetfulness. Suddenly, a beam of light strikes you. Where does it come from, the beam of light? Because someone is walking mindfully. And from him, from her, light is emitted. And one of the beams of light coming from that person strikes you, and suddenly you become different. Suddenly, you become mindful in your walking. Suddenly, you get out of your sorrow. And you touch the blue sky. You touch the kingdom of God. And you begin to walk mindfully like the other person. And as you begin to walk mindfully and you smile to the vegetation, light begins to be emitted from your own body. And light emitted from your own body might strike another person

[50:13]

who has come to the kingdom and help him or her to be awake and to touch the kingdom of God. You find out that anyone who is mindful, anyone who can be in the present moment is emitting light. And that light can strike anyone that happens to be in the kingdom and wake him up, wake her up. And in her turn, she begins to emit light like everyone else. And Cathy realizes that the kingdom of God is available all the time. She needs to be there, body and mind united. And then the blue sky is revealed to her. The beautiful red leaf is revealed to her. And she is able to meet with great beings,

[51:14]

bodhisattvas and buddhas, at any time, anywhere. And then Cathy was helped to look into herself. . . . Look at me, you hear me? Look at me.

[52:38]

Here is something like an orange representing yourself. An orange with five sections. The first section of the orange represents your body, Cathy. And that is called form, rupa, your body. Form. And Cathy, you may like to smile to your body.

[53:45]

This is a very good practice. Maybe there are things that do not go well within your body. Maybe there are blocks of pain within your body. So Cathy, would you like to smile to your own body? Your body needs your attention. And if you can touch your body and smile to it, it would very much help. Cathy, I ask you to lie down and to practice total relaxation. I allow my body to rest. And then I begin to be mindful of my forehead. Breathing in, I am aware of my forehead.

[54:47]

Breathing out, I smile to it. Cathy, I like to use the energy of mindfulness in order to embrace my forehead, to embrace the brain within my head, to embrace my eyes, to embrace my ear, to embrace my nose. And every time I breathe in, I become aware of one part of my body. And every time I breathe out, I smile to that part of my body. I know this is a very good practice because I am using the energy of mindfulness and of love to embrace that part of my body. Slowly. And I slowly go down. I embrace my heart. I embrace my lungs. I embrace my stomach. Breathing in, I am aware of my heart.

[55:48]

Breathing out, I embrace my heart. I smile to my heart. I am practicing scanning my body with the light of my mindfulness. I always embrace each part of my body with the energy of mindfulness and smile to that part of my body with compassion and concern. And after I have finished scanning my body like that, I feel wonderful. And I do it, Cathy, every day. I need only 20 minutes or 25 minutes in order to complete the practice of scanning my body not with the x-ray, not with the laser, but with the light of my mindfulness, the energy of my mindfulness. And this is the way I allow my body to rest and I embrace it with love and kindness.

[56:55]

Cathy, you should learn the way how to take good care of your body to allow it to rest and to embrace it with tenderness and compassion and love. Cathy, the second section of the orange represents your feeling. There is a river of feelings within you, Cathy, flowing day and night. And every drop of water in that river is a feeling. You may like to practice sitting on the bank of the river of feelings and observe every feeling that is born and that stays for some time and begins to die down. It's fun. Recognize each feeling as it is born.

[58:00]

It may be a pleasant feeling. It may be an unpleasant feeling. It may be a neutral feeling. But whatever feeling arises, you become aware of it, you smile to it, and you look deeply into it and you embrace it with all your heart. Whether it is pleasant or not pleasant, embrace it. Embrace it with all your being, with your true presence. It's very rewarding, Cathy. Because if you continue to do so, you can look deeply into each feeling and you discover the true nature of each feeling. And you'll be no longer afraid of any feeling, even if it is a strong emotion, a difficult, hard, painful kind of feeling.

[59:07]

You know that you are able to embrace it and to take care of it. You will never have to run away from a feeling, even if that feeling is painful. You know you are more than your feeling and you are able to embrace that feeling in order to take good care of it. Cathy, don't be afraid. You can do it. You can take good care of your feeling. You don't have to run away from your feeling. Bell Bell Cathy, the third section of the orange represents your perception.

[60:10]

There is the river of form, always flowing. Every cell of your body is a drop of water in that feeling. Birth and death happen all the time, at every second, in your river of form. Birth and death happen all the time, day and night, in the river of feelings. But there is a third river in you, Cathy, that is the river of perceptions. And perceptions arise, stay for some time, and die down. You perceive the sky, you perceive the cloud, you perceive the leaf, you perceive the river, you perceive the person you love, you perceive the person you hate. And everything there is the object of your perceptions. You have right perceptions, but very often you have wrong perceptions

[61:29]

and you suffer. And Cathy, it's very good, it's very helpful if you know how to learn to embrace your perceptions and to look deeply into the nature of your perceptions. Cathy, don't be sure of anything. If you are too sure of your perceptions, you are going to suffer a lot. Therefore, when you perceive something, you have to be careful. I am perceiving it, but is my perception correct? Am I sure? Am I sure? Cathy, it's a very good question. Because if you ask yourself that question, Am I sure? And then you have another chance to look again into your perception and there may be a chance for you to discover

[62:30]

that your perception is incorrect. And then you can avoid a lot of suffering, Cathy. Because according to us, most of our perceptions are incorrect because we don't know how to look at things deeply enough. Cathy, there is a fourth section of the orange representing the mental formations. Cathy, your feeling is a mental formation. Your perception is a mental formation. But you still have many other mental formations

[63:34]

like hope, like fear, like jealousy, like despair, like love, like compassion. You have a lot of mental formations. Anything that is made with a lot of elements is called a formation. A flower is a formation because a flower is made of many elements like the sunshine, the cloud, the seed, the garden, the soil, the mineral, the gardener, and so on. So a flower is a formation. Your fear is also a formation, but it is a mental formation. Your body is a formation, but that is a physical formation. Here you have feeling as a mental formation.

[64:35]

Here you have perception as a mental formation. But outside these two kinds of mental formations you still have 49 other categories of mental formations. And mindfulness, your mindfulness, Cathy, is one of the mental formations. And when you have mindfulness manifested in you, you can touch the blue sky, you can touch the kingdom of God. And therefore, Cathy, it is very beneficial for you to touch the seed of mindfulness and to help it grow so that the energy of mindfulness can be generated for you to touch the beautiful things and to embrace hell every time, hell likes to come and visit. And Cathy, there is the fifth section of the orange

[65:42]

representing your consciousness. Consciousness. Consciousness, Cathy, is the ground for all mental formations. When the mental formations are not manifested, they stay here in consciousness in the form of seeds. The seed of joy, the seed of peace, the seed of understanding, the seed of compassion, the seed of forgetfulness, the seed of jealousy, the seed of fear, the seed of despair, you have all kinds of seeds within you, Cathy. You have 49, 50, 51 categories of seeds buried deeply in the deeper level of your consciousness.

[66:45]

And every time you touch one of them, or you allow it to be touched by someone else, that seed will manifest itself to become a mental formation. And that is why, Cathy, be careful about your seed. Don't touch and don't let others touch the negative seed in you. Because once these negative seeds are touched, they will manifest themselves into a mental formation. And you have to take care of that mental formation, to take good care of it in order for it not to overwhelm you. And, Cathy, if you look deeply into the five rivers of yourself, you see that each one of the rivers contains all the other four. Look at the river of form.

[67:52]

In the beginning, you may think that form is not important. Form is not feeling. Form is not perception. Form is not mental formation. Form is not consciousness. This is just the physical and not the mental. You are wrong, Cathy. Because form contains all the four. You know, Cathy, every cell in your body contains all of yourself. You know, Cathy, in our time, they can take one cell of your body and make a duplication of your body. They call it cloning. You know the teaching of Buddha. The one contains the all. One cell, one single cell of your body is enough to represent, to embrace,

[68:55]

and to make manifest all your being. So not only a cell of your body contains the entire body of yours, but it contains all the feelings, all the perceptions, all the mental formations, and all the consciousness, not only yours, but also of your parents, of your ancestors, of several generations, just in one cell of your body. So, the first section contains the other four sections. Cathy, it is the same with other categories of your five skandhas. You think that feeling is not form, but each feeling contains the entire form.

[69:59]

Each feeling contains all perceptions, all mental formations, all consciousness. Looking into one feeling only, you can discover everything. The one contains the many. You need only to look deeply into one of your feelings, and you can understand you, because one of your feelings contains all the data that you need to understand the whole cosmos. Not to say, to understand you alone. So Cathy, learn to look, to look in the light of interbeing, to see the all in the one, and to see the one in the all. Don't think that form exists outside of feelings. Don't think that feeling exists outside of the form. And in the world of the unconceivable,

[71:01]

in the Avatamsaka realm, in the kingdom of God, you have to look in such a way so that you can see the interbeing nature of everything. Before coming to the kingdom of God, you may think that everything exists outside of everything else, but once you enter the unconceivable realm, you discover that the all is contained in the one. You just look into this lid and you see the whole cosmos in it. You think that the Buddha is outside of you. You have to go and look for him, but in fact, he is inside. You don't have to move an inch. Here is the oak tree, and not the pipala tree, and yet if you sit down, it becomes the pipala tree, and your seat becomes the diamond seat. It is your inside that counts,

[72:05]

and inside depends on your way of looking, looking deeply. Kathi, I now draw another circle, and I divide it into two sections only. The above section represents all the mental formations, feelings, perceptions, or any kind of mental formations. The lower part of the orange represents consciousness. I would call it store consciousness. Why store?

[73:10]

Because this is the place where all the mental formations are stored in the form of seeds, bijas, the seeds of peace, of joy, of happiness, of compassion, the seeds of anger, hatred, despair, discrimination. All these seeds are buried here in the soil of store consciousness, alaya vijnana. And every time such a seed is touched, is watered, it will manifest itself on the upper level of my consciousness, which I call mind consciousness. If a wonderful seed is touched,

[74:14]

it will manifest itself above, and I'll be happy. Suppose this is the seed of joy, this is the seed of love, of forgiveness. If you come and touch that seed within my store consciousness, it will manifest, and it will make me very happy. This is equivalent to my living room, mind consciousness. This store consciousness is equivalent to the basement of my house. There are things that I don't want to display in my living room. I push it down. There are blocks of pain that are buried deeply down here, and I don't want them to show up,

[75:16]

because I know once they show up in the living room of mine, I will have to suffer. That is why I always practice the policy of repression. I always want them to lie down there. And I set up a kind of embargo here. I don't want them to emerge. Kati, people who know how to love you and take care of you, they never come and touch those negative seeds in you, because they know if they do, you have to suffer, because these seeds will manifest themselves within yourself. They don't want to touch the seeds of depression, of jealousy, of fear, of anger in you,

[76:19]

because they know that if they do so, you will have to suffer. They are true lovers. That is why, Kati, they refrain from touching the negative seeds in you. Kati, you have to tell them, Please, if you do love me, don't touch the negative seeds in me. Instead, please recognize the positive seeds in me and touch them every day. Touch the seeds of joy, of peace, of confidence, of love, of peace in me. And that is the only way you make me happy. Kati, those who profess to be true lovers, they should learn the way of watering the seeds. That is called

[77:20]

selective watering of the seeds. You only water the beautiful seeds in the person you love. She'll be happy, she'll be smiling, she'll be fresh, and you will profit. And if you don't practice selective watering of the seeds, then she'll be angry, she'll be unhappy, and you have to suffer also. So, true lovers, you have to be careful. Kati, there are people who have big blocks of pain down here. They are very afraid that these blocks of pain will emerge. That is why they try to block them, to block the way. And the usual way for them to do so is to invite other guests to come from the outside and to occupy the living room all the time. They know that if the living room is occupied

[78:30]

then these blocks of pain will not come up. That is why they make use of televisions, novels, guests, and anything that can help them occupy the living room day and night. But Kati, at night it's difficult because at night there are no guests. That is why these blocks of pain are being used to emerge. And that is why you can practice repression during the daytime, but at night you are at the mercy of your blocks of pain. They can emerge at any time. They can bring hell to you every night. Kati, it is very dangerous to practice this kind of blockage,

[79:31]

blockade, because by repressing your mental formations you create a situation of blockage. You create bad circulation within your psyche, Kati. That is very dangerous. You know, Kati, when the blood does not circulate well in your body, you get sick. There will be pain everywhere in your body. That is why you have to help the blood to circulate well. You practice massage. You take the kind of drugs, chemicals that help to push, to help the blood to circulate better in your veins. The same thing is true with your psyche. If you try to block your psyche, you block your pain,

[80:33]

and then one month, three months, six months, you create a bad circulation within your psyche, and symptoms of mental illness will begin to appear, to appear first in your body. You may have pain or headache, and you may look for a painkiller, but that is not, that does not work, because the root is in your psyche. Sometimes you have a headache, but that headache has a root in your feelings, in your perceptions, in the war, in the conflict within the depth of your consciousness. You cannot buy a painkiller in a pharmacy. And your doctors have no power to heal it, because they know that the pain that you are having in your head or your body,

[81:36]

they have a root in your psyche. And therefore, you know that in order for the symptoms, these symptoms of mental illness to disappear, you have to allow the mental formations in you to circulate freely. But you are afraid, you are afraid that they will come up. How? You ask. Cathy, there is a wonderful way. If you train yourself in mindfulness, there is a wonderful seed within your store consciousness, it's called the seed of mindfulness. If you know how to touch it, and water it, and have it manifested here, and the energy of mindfulness generated will be able to embrace any block of pain and fear any time they come up.

[82:38]

Practice, Cathy, so that you have enough of that energy in order to take care of your pain. You know, Cathy, you have to embrace your hell and transform it. You should not be too afraid of your hell because there is a way in which you can make yourself strong enough in order to take care of your pain and your sorrow. That is the cultivation of the energy of mindfulness. Practice mindful breathing, Cathy. Practice mindful walking. Enjoy your meal in mindfulness. Enjoy making your breakfast in mindfulness. And then your mindfulness will be strong enough to take care of the mental formations that would like to go into your living room. Cathy, you should remove

[83:39]

this kind of blockade. I'll be with you, Cathy, in the case you are not strong enough to handle your pain. I hold your hand, Cathy. I'm here for you, Cathy. Allow it to come up. Breathe in and out, Cathy, and use the energy of mindfulness to embrace your pain. Breathing in, I know my anger is in me. Breathing out, I am embracing my anger. Breathing in, I recognize the energy of anger in me. Breathing out, I am taking good care of my anger. Cathy, you do not practice suppressing your anger. In fact, mindfulness is there to welcome your anger,

[84:39]

to recognize it, and to take care of it. Embrace your anger, Cathy, like a mother would embrace her baby when the baby suffers. When the baby suffers, the mother would stop walking in the kitchen and walk into the baby's room. She would pick the baby up and hold the baby tenderly into her arms. The mother does not know yet what is wrong with the baby, but she embraces it. She takes the baby in her arms anyway and embraces it tenderly. The fact that she embraces her baby tenderly is already very helpful because the energy of tenderness and love has begun to penetrate into the body of the baby. Maybe one minute or two minutes after, the baby stops crying.

[85:40]

The same thing is true with your pain, Cathy, because a block of pain is there. If you know how to produce your mindfulness and embrace it, one form of energy embraces another form of energy. The second source of energy begins to penetrate deep into the first zone of energy. That is the practice of calming, of relieving, that you can do, Cathy. You can always embrace your pain in your mindfulness. That will always give the effect of soothing, of calming, and you'll be surprised that you are able to take care of your pain, of your health. We are here, Cathy, to support you.

[86:42]

After 15 or 20 minutes of embracing your pain, you find that your pain, the energy of your pain, has decreased a little bit. The phenomenon of discharge, your pain will lose some of its strength before going down to the bottom of your consciousness. Your pain has taken a kind of mindfulness bath. Your pain has taken a kind of bath, a mindfulness bath, during 5 minutes or 10 minutes. It depends on your practice, Cathy. After having taken the mindfulness bath, it will go back here a little bit weaker, and you are confident, Cathy,

[88:03]

because you know next time when it emerges, you know what to do, and you will take care of it exactly like you have taken care of it for the first time. And now, you are no longer afraid. You have opened all the doors here, and the blocks of pain can emerge at any time and go back at any time, and you have restored the good circulation of your psyche. And Cathy, the symptoms of your mental illnesses will begin to disappear one by one after a short time. Silence.

[89:08]

Silence. Mindfulness is the kind of energy we need in order to recognize the pain, the sorrow in us. Mindfulness is not there to suppress, but to welcome, to recognize, and to embrace. That is why the cultivation of mindfulness is central in Buddhist meditation. Do whatever you like in your daily life, but do it mindfully. Eating, cleaning, washing, watering, cooking,

[90:36]

walking, sitting, anything but mindfully. As you do it, mindfulness is being cultivated, and that is the energy of the Buddha that can help recognize, embrace, and transform. In our civilization, we have the tendency to eliminate what we don't want. If there is something wrong in our body, we are inclined to open our body, cut it, and throw it away. We don't know the art of embracing, touching, recognizing, and transforming. Why do we have to throw away? If we continue to throw, there will be much left after some time. Doctors are ready to propose a surgery.

[91:37]

Therapists tend to think of the same way. If you have some kind of pain, sorrow in you, and you want to throw it out, you want to get it out of your system, you want to ventilate it, you don't know how to accept, to recognize, to embrace it in order to help it, to transform. Therefore, we should learn the other way. Not the way of elimination, but the way of accepting, embracing, and transforming. A therapist would advise you when you are angry to get in touch with your anger

[92:42]

by practicing hitting a pillow. For instance, you are angry, you are overwhelmed by your anger. You should express your anger. You use a big pillow, and you use all your strength to hit the pillow for 15 minutes or half an hour. And you get exhausted after that. And you think that you have taken it from your system. You think that you feel better. But the fact is that you just get exhausted. And during the time you pound your pillow, you are not getting your anger out of your system at all. You are really strengthening it. You are rehearsing your anger. You feel better, yes, because you are tired.

[93:49]

The energy of anger is made of other kinds of energy. The energy of anger is made of milk, of bread, of nutrition. So if you eat again, you drink again, you get other energies that will feed your anger. If you are used to hit your anger, if you are used to hit your pillow, then next time you might be facing not a pillow, but a real person at whom you are angry with. And since you have the habit of hitting, you hit him, you hit her. And that is very dangerous. So it is not healthy, it is not helpful to practice hitting the pillow, because by hitting the pillow you rehearse your anger,

[94:55]

you help it to grow in the depth of your consciousness. It is dangerous. You say that you are getting in touch with your anger, but I am not sure. You are not even in touch with the pillow. Because if you are really in touch with the pillow, you would know that it is only a pillow. And you would not hit it. Therefore, we should learn the other way, the way of inviting it up, recognize it, embrace it tenderly, and look deeply into its nature. And the agent that will do the work is mindfulness. Mindfulness is the Buddha available at any time. And we should allow the Buddha

[95:57]

to have a chance to enter our life and to help us. After the mother has held the baby for a few minutes, concentrated, she finds out the reason why the baby suffers. The baby may be hungry. The baby may have a little fever. Or the diaper may be a little bit too tight. And after having seen the cause, it would be very easy for the mother to arrange so that the baby stops to suffer. We do the same. After having embraced our pain for some time, we look deeply into the nature of our suffering. After having recognized

[97:28]

and embraced our pain, our anger, our suffering, we continue to hold our pain within the arms of our mindfulness. And we begin to look deeply into it. And finally, we see the true nature of our suffering. To find the true nature of our suffering is very crucial. Because after you have found it, you can see the way out. And you only have to follow the way. And your suffering, your pain will vanish after some time later. And this is what we are going to learn in the next Dharma talk.

[98:25]

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