This podcast is offered by the San Francisco Zen Center on the web at www.sfzc.org. Our public programs are made possible by donations from people like you. Good morning. Maybe it's difficult to be a human being. difficult in an ordinary way to deal with the things that come up in the relational world that come up inside of ourselves in meeting what's meeting something that we don't know what it could be and immediately we want to interpret it

[01:05]

And it's difficult in the point of view of dharma understanding, it's difficult to be a human being when you consider that it is our true nature to be Buddhas, to be fully awake and also liberated liberated from our karma while still having karma, while still being, suffering human beings at the same time to be completely willing to not be pushed and pulled around by our old karmic patterns and habits. So it's strange, isn't it, that maybe only a small percentage of human beings on the planet right now are fully realized Buddhas.

[02:26]

It's maybe hard to tell, right? How can we tell? You actually can't recognize a Buddha by any particular outward appearance, right? says so right in the Diamond Sutra. So here we are on the seventh day of Rohatsu Sashin. Tomorrow we will recognize Buddha's Enlightenment Bodhi Day and we'll have our Tassahara Bodhi Day ceremony. even if we haven't rehearsed it yet. Just looked over at the Eno. Oh yeah, we just did a ceremony last night.

[03:30]

Now I have to get ready for another one, and then another one, and then another one. With that time of the practice period where we kind of just roll over and have another ceremony. Roll over and have another ceremony. So... Some of these are just part of how we actually express our deep feeling, our deep love for this practice, our deep love for each other, our deep love for the Buddha nature in each other. So even when faced with Maybe some of you aren't in the room yesterday when I mentioned why we were having a well-being ceremony right after tea for the families of the people who have the young children who were killed in Connecticut in this school shooting.

[04:41]

It happened yesterday morning. So what's the bodhisattva response? I think, first of all, if you can stop the harm being done, if you're in a situation where you can do something to stop harm being done, to immediately do that, and then find your own, say, compassionate heart. So when we... when we chant the enme juku kanon gyo we are invoking our own compassionate heart in the form of avalokiteshvara avalokiteshvara or kanon avalokiteshvara can take many forms and has many we say many hands and eyes

[05:51]

many hands to actually be helpful and many eyes to see what is. And it comes from this kind of fundamental principle of compassion that the compassionate one does not turn away from suffering. So one of the translations of Avalokiteshvara is Regarder of the cries of the world. Regarder of the cries of the world. So one who is willing to hear without diminishing or exaggerating to actually hear the cries of the world just as they are. This world may be vast and it may be small, any size world, wherever the sound comes from, wherever the feeling or sensation, whatever it is, it comes from.

[07:08]

So we know that we have this potential and at the same time don't always feel the courage to be willing to stay present. So even though we don't feel like it, we stay, we have this vow to stay present. And so that's the essence of zazen. The vow to stay present no matter what arises. So when we're sitting in the zendo, it's a pretty well protected environment. Pretty safe environment. We can't control everything. You never know when flag rock's going to come tumbling down.

[08:16]

These mountains are only about two million years old. Just young, growing mountains. I better not get off onto that, onto local geology. We're celestial. Last night it was pointed out to me. Right up there is Andromeda. A little cloud you can see, a little kind of cloud light. Andromeda, our nearest neighbor galaxy. The only one. Actually, I had thought that many of the stars that I could see were from other galaxies. But with the equipment I have, basically, some lenses, In my eyes I can only see stars in our own galaxy except for a little kind of cloud which is rushing toward us at a frightening speed.

[09:34]

But it's not as scary as what's going on inside our own bodies actually. So the little clouds in our own bodies are actually more troublesome for us. The sixth ancestor, Hui Nung, said this first precept for the bodhisattva, the bodhisattva vows to save all beings. He said, begin with saving all beings in your own mind. Begin with saving all beings in your own heart. mind. And we can say your hara. Begin with saving all beings in your own heart, mind, and hara. So what does that mean to save? That means to listen. Listen very carefully. Take this compassionate relationship to heart.

[10:47]

You can cultivate a compassionate relationship to the clouds, little cloud clusters in your own body, your own heart, in your own mind. And you can do that because you have Buddha mind, because you are actually Buddha mind. From the place of Buddha mind, you can regard everything that comes up in small mind, and clinging heart and tension in the hara with compassion and wisdom that sees that it's not substantial. It's empty of a fixed essential reality. So this is our

[11:48]

teaching of the main monk up here, Manjushri, waving his little sword, just has a little sword, popping little bubbles of delusion, you know, or cutting through big ones, big knots of delusion. A versatile sword, but Just the right size. And very quick. So, I had the thought yesterday of the phrase, the better angels of our nature, which is coming from Abraham Lincoln. And... Abraham Lincoln didn't have much schooling, but he could still produce a sentence.

[12:58]

This is the conclusion of his first inaugural address. This is a very challenging time for the country. Before he was inaugurated, Jefferson Davis had been installed as a president of the Confederacy, I think, or something like that, or had been elected, or something like that. So this was a time of tremendous divisiveness. But the last few lines of this inaugural address, we are not enemies, but friends. We must not be enemies. Though passion may have strained it, must not break our bonds of affection. The mystic chords of memory, stretching from every battlefield and patriot grave to every living heart and hearthstone all over this broad land, will yet swell the chorus of the union when again touched

[14:17]

as surely they will be by the better angels of our nature. The mystic chords of memory touched by the better angels of our nature. So we have in this lineage so much to be grateful for that we call up the better angels of our own nature to touch the mystic chords of the Buddha's teaching and all of the reminders of our lineage and our ancestors. So I feel so grateful and it's helpful to sometimes recall. It's actually good when we're thinking about, okay, some of us will not be here the next practice period at Zen Shinji.

[15:26]

Some of us will be traveling. Some of us will be moving into what we call busy life. You may have forgotten by now the end of practice period that this is not busy. Did you notice? Have you noticed? What we're doing here is not busy. Busy is relative, yeah. And it's actually okay to be engaged. But then to remember, oh, there's a way of being engaged and not being busy. To be busy and also not busy. But here, every day, we get up and we chant the reminder of all my ancient twisted karma.

[16:41]

from beginningless greed, hate, and delusion. Beginningless, we don't even know, you know, how did this get started? How did this suffering get started? Why is it so difficult to be a human being when the blue jays don't have any trouble being blue jays? And the maple tree knows what's time to lose its leaves and bud out again. I said, bud out, not bud out. So, yeah, we're surrounded by so many beings who know what to do and who to be, who they are. And as a human, we have these difficulties not knowing who we are, not knowing what to be and what to do.

[17:44]

So as Suzuki Roshi was saying that we need something, we need some form. We need a discipline to submit to, actually. Which is the meaning of jihad, by the way. To submit, to surrender to a discipline. So this... When you find a good discipline to submit to, then to take it up. So when we say disciple of the Buddha, as we said last night in this ceremony... By the way, thank you all again for the wonderful ceremony. To be a disciple, to be one who actually takes up the discipline of this path... these teachings, these forms, and takes it up in a way that brings a creative kind of living energy to embodying this.

[19:02]

This is actually essential to choose to do this, to choose to be a human being. We sometimes have some idea that, oh, we... we could be natural and unencumbered and strangely enough we actually have the feeling of being natural and unencumbered when we take up an appropriate discipline and taking up a discipline that is that is big enough it's great to have a discipline that's boundless So fortunately, this discipline is boundless. To take up the practice of zazen is boundless. This discipline then of being completely willing to be still at one place, at one point, where the shakyamuni

[20:20]

sits in one place, willing to stay there all night, all day, all night, all day, as long as it takes, as long as it takes for his heart to be at peace. So this is... This really is the, I say, kind of intuitive sense of every human being. This doesn't matter. Whatever age you are, whatever gender you are, whatever race you are, whatever your capacities, it really doesn't matter. that there is still this germ, this seed of this inclination or intuitive sense to be completely at peace right where I am, right where one is.

[21:36]

So this, I think, is a gift from, we say, we don't know where, right? We say from Prajnaparamita. Homage to Prajnaparamita, the mother of the Buddhas. So we have homage to some source wherein we find within ourselves this sense so that we actually know the better angels of our nature when we see them. We may not be able to define them, but when... But we have some feeling for that. Some feeling for the better angels of our nature. The better bodhisattva guardians of our nature. So Shakyamuni sits with this kind of I'd say a sense of

[22:49]

determination, all of the paramitas are present, being willing to be patient, at the same time being willing to cultivate effort, energy, concentration, So we recognize this and we honor it and are inspired, I think, by Bodhi, Bodhide, by the image of the Buddha just sitting. Really not doing anything out of the ordinary. Just sitting. Just sitting and being willing to see.

[23:52]

Being willing to see everything internally and everything externally without turning away. And then, if the Buddha stopped there, we wouldn't have the Buddha. So the Buddha then gets up and walks along and meets suffering people and gives them some guidance in various ways. So this is... going from wisdom, seeing the impermanence of everything and how things come into being and how suffering arises and seeing all that and then being willing to compassionately meet people and take up the practice of activities.

[25:09]

So we have our three... The three archetypal bodhisattvas that we cite, you know, every time we do the chant, we say, Manjushri, wisdom, and Samantabhadra, great activity, and Avalokiteshvara, great compassion. So these are, this is who we are. at our best. This is who each of us is. At the same time, we know that we have all of the tendencies that are unwholesome and harmful. We know that we have greed, hate, and delusion. So to acknowledge that every day is something that we do here in this

[26:15]

practice period. When you're not here in the practice period, how do you do that? So I suggest that people consider how to support your own ongoing enlightening practice. Because the Buddha didn't just stay and have this one experience, say, and then say that was it. He continued to cultivate ways to live in an enlightening, awakening life every day. Very humble. He just walked from place to place. Stayed close to nature. and sat and recalled, you know, what is it?

[27:28]

What is it to be a bodhisattva? So in the Diamond Sutra, when Sabuti asks at the beginning question in the Diamond Sutra is, how do bodhisattvas abide? And how do bodhisattvas go forward? And how do bodhisattvas regulate their own minds? And the Tathagata responds saying, bodhisattvas make this vow. Make this vow that whatever beings there are, no matter where they came from, of course I'm paraphrasing here, no matter how they were born, what was their source, what was their origin? Were they anything like a human being? Were they some other kind of being?

[28:35]

Did they just miraculously spring into being? Did they have consciousness or not? Is it impossible to determine whether they have consciousness or not? All these beings, all these beings, I will liberate. All these beings I will. I will include. I will include in this realm of liberation. Leaving none of them behind. And at the same time, the Buddha and Satagata goes on to say, at the same time, the Bodhisattva realizes there are no beings. A Bodhisattva does not get caught in the thought of being, of being any entity, of having any self.

[29:44]

So this is how a bodhisattva makes this vow. Seeing that there are no beings, the bodhisattva vows to liberate each one in its own fragile appearance. And then the bodhisattva is completely generous Not supported by any particular kind of belief in anything. Not supported by even a sense that what is felt by the senses is substantial. Not dependent on anything the bodhisattva gives and gives. Gives full attention. So this is this great vow.

[30:56]

This vow that has no boundary. This vow that's immediate. So each thing that shows up is already included. And it needs to be refreshed every day, if not every hour, if not every minute. When I moved from Green Gulch, I didn't know what I was going to do. I had no idea. And I asked for a reference from a former employer. I had one local former employer who was a general contractor. And I said, you know, I'll need a reference. I don't know. I'll have to think of some kind of job to do. I need to earn some money. And this former employer said, well, I'm about to start building a big house in Tiburon.

[32:12]

And if you want to come back and work for me, you can do that. So I did. And then it was a big challenge how to take the practice from living in residence, being supported by the daily forms and rituals of practice into working on a carpentry crew with people who had no idea. of cultivating the Dharma and for me how could I how could I remember to be conscious in the middle of being productive having to be productive getting paid for it getting paid on the basis of being productive you know

[33:18]

How many windows can you install in a day? How many 2x4s can you nail up and form up walls without getting annoyed at the person who kicks your level off the deck every day? I had a helper, an apprentice carpenter. He seemed to have a knack for kicking my tool off the second floor deck. Oops. Dropping other things dangerously. Boom, here comes a hammer. So, you have to be kind of alert.

[34:23]

But it's not helpful to get angry. How can I remember that I'm not actually doing anything? I'm not busy. When I'm hustling across from one part of the job site to another. So this is not easy practice, actually. But it's possible. It's not possible to, say, rest in your laurels, but it is possible to keep at it, to keep working at how to bring awareness to the midst of activity. So we have some of that practice here, of course. Work practice. And still, when you're on your own, you need, I think, to find some way to do it.

[35:34]

So I, for myself, I did not sit zazen for about two months or so. I confess. And then I began to have a feeling that things were kind of... kind of, I don't know, a little cloudier or thin. There was a kind of a thinness. There wasn't an intensity or a kind of a liquid clarity to things. It's hard to describe, but I thought I'm in danger. I'm in danger. I better start setting Zazen again. So I started sitting Zazen. Mostly on my own in the morning, but the only time I could do it really would be in the morning. So getting up earlier reminded me of, people know that the poet Bill Stafford, William Stafford, determined to be a poet.

[36:47]

How do you be a poet? Well, you write a poem. When do you do it? Every day. You write a poem every day. You're a poet. So he would say, I'm going to get up every morning and write a poem every day, which he did for years. And then there was a time when he had a daughter who was young, and she said, I want to help dad. This is a little bit like Lehman Pong's daughter, right? Lehman Pong's daughter helping her dad. Bill Stafford's daughter, maybe she's five years old. Maybe she's six or seven, something like that. She says, I'm going to help Dad. So she would get up as soon as he would get up. And he felt, I can't write a poem with her help. I need to have my solitude as a poet to write a poem.

[37:51]

So he would get up earlier. So then she would get up earlier. I think he finally wore her out or something. But it was three in the morning he had to get up. So it's kind of like that. To take up this practice in the busy world. Sometimes you need to get up earlier than everyone else so that you can actually remember what you're doing that day and set your intention. Remember your vow. Or you have to find the time that works for you. But I think daily practice is something that as human beings it's amazing what we can forget how much we can forget the better angels of our nature so to have this kind of reminder and then when I started my own business I didn't have to produce for somebody else so then I had the problem and so I tried various experiments like

[39:16]

for a while I stopped every hour for three minutes or five minutes or something. I actually just stopped in the middle of whatever I'm doing and stand or sit down and come back to my breath. So if you do that, maybe you have to do it every hour, maybe you have to do it every half hour, maybe you have to do it, three times a day, maybe you have to do it. But in the end, you have to do it every moment. In the end, you have to be willing to be present every moment. But sometimes it takes a kind of a, as I said at the beginning of this practice period, a clunky, hinny on a practice. some way to disengage from the karmic tendencies that otherwise just take over there's so much in our whole culture so much in our whole culture that's misleading

[40:43]

Some of it's intentionally misleading. There's lots of propaganda out there. I remember when I was a kid in high school studying propaganda, we thought, Russia has state propaganda, and in the USA, a capitalist system, we have... commercial propaganda. And we're susceptible to it. We're susceptible. And that's how it works. So there's a lot of misleading say hooks and temptations that are intentionally being put out there. And then there are a lot that are also unintentional. And there are many that are intended to be actually helpful that are still dangerous, you know.

[41:51]

That are not going to produce what they promise. Absolute satisfaction cannot be found in a chocolate chip cookie. Or in a new dishwashing detergent. Or in the constitution. the Declaration of Independence or the Diamond Sutra. So even things that are intended to be helpful have their limits. So that's why we remind ourselves a bodhisattva does not depend on any conception. of a being a bodhisattva is not fooled by the appearance of substantiality even though the bodhisattva is helpful helping beings so this is an ongoing challenge and we need to help each other so I think

[43:14]

Wherever you go, it's good to have some good companions, to cultivate good companions. So we call this sangha. Cultivating good companions is... And... Sanghas, of course, are difficult because people show up who you wouldn't necessarily choose. Difficult people show up. It's the other people who are the difficult people. Sometimes you...

[44:17]

Yeah, we find ourselves wondering, you know, why is that person here? They're not really practicing. They've been here for this long and they still don't know that you turn clockwise. Boy, that's annoying. or they come up people come up and make demands and they also express their feelings even when their feelings are stupid or even when their feelings are so much like mine that I don't like them.

[45:17]

They're like the feelings I don't like in myself, right? So sanghas are always a problem, you know. And so we're always on the edge of, you know, is it a healthy sangha or is it a not healthy sangha? Thank you, kitchen. So even if the sangha is not so good, we need sangha. However, there are sanghas sometimes that are sick, that need help. And there are sometimes leaders that are

[46:20]

actually violating the trust that they're given. So this is not easy and it's helpful. It's sometimes I think peer relationships are very helpful. Peer relationships from the leaders of one sangha and another to say, you know, how are things going? so that we need each other to maintain or return to some perspective. And then to come back and refresh our intention. So sangha should always, should have some way of refreshing intention. I think Suzuki Roshi's thought of beginner's mind, you know, was this intention to refresh.

[47:28]

sangha on a wide scale to actually have American people who don't know so much about how Buddhism is supposed to look what Buddhism is supposed to look like since we don't know we can actually refresh Buddhism so this is this beginner's mind that we are entrusted with And then it turns out it takes some experience to appreciate beginner's mind. So it takes Zen mind to appreciate beginner's mind. And then maybe it takes beginner's mind to appreciate Zen mind. So this is how... Manjushri is young, you know.

[48:34]

Only 16. Sweet 16. Main monk. So I was thinking of this and now I have to apologize for what happens when I start thinking about something and it leads you into something else I thought beginner's mind and Manjushri's forever young so there was a song and dance man still around right Bob Dylan These were his, this is a kind of prayer actually, right? May God bless and keep you always.

[49:39]

May your wishes all come true. May you always do for others and let others do for you. May you build a ladder to the stars and climb on every rung. May you stay forever young. Forever young Forever young May you stay Forever young May you grow up to be righteous May you grow up to be true May you always know the truth And see the light surrounding you May you always be courageous May you always be courageous Stand upright and be strong. May you stay forever young.

[50:41]

Forever young. Forever young. You can join in if you like. May you stay forever young. May your hands always be busy. Not like, you know, busy, but be like, not busy, busy. May your feet always be swift, like the chiseau. May you have a strong foundation in emptiness when the winds of changes shift in permanence. May your heart always be joyful, and your horror too, And may your song always be sung. May you stay forever young. Forever young. Forever young.

[51:46]

May you stay forever young. Forever young. Forever young, may you stay forever young. So the first time I heard that song, I thought, oh, how deluded can you be? So you have to understand it as beginners bind, right? I think. This is the intention here. Beginner's mind, nothing is forever, but beginner's mind is always generated, fresh, forever, young. So, any questions?

[52:48]

Yes. If you suggest that we can't find complete satisfaction in a chocolate chip cookie or a dishwashing detergent or Bill of Rights or anything like that, what do you suggest we look for it? So stop looking and see what is. I don't know that Buddha guarantees anything. That's the trouble with Buddhism, right? No guarantees. I think that's one of the reasons I trust it. So I'd say, don't trust anything with guarantees.

[53:53]

You get your money back. Yeah, you do. Yeah. As soon as you pay it, you've got your money back. Yeah. It's instantaneous. You understand? As soon as you write that big check, as soon as you pay the bill, you receive it. So, even though there's no guarantees, that's my answer. You get your money back. Everything you put into it is completely received. Not to. So, now that's clear. Yeah.

[54:58]

Yes? What falls on me in your question is if you stop looking and you just see what is and you expect that to be satisfying, that's already a problem. You were right about that. Yeah. No expectations. So When I was quoting Dogen's Zazen poem, you know, fish swim like fish, birds fly like birds. This practice is effort without desire. So without desire means without expecting. Yeah. It is very scary. Very, very scary. So, this is the way to be fearless.

[56:07]

Which means be completely scared. When that's what's happening, to be completely scared. Not wishing for something else. There's a hand up from the, yes? Behind the altar. Yes. I talked on Silent Day? Well, I was talking about Silent Day.

[57:22]

Okay. We live in a Judeo-Christian society. Also, the Hindus have theirs. The Muslims have theirs. The Jews have theirs. But you were saying, you know, the Buddhists, we don't really have. We have a question mark. That's terrible, isn't it? I might have said that, yeah. That's how I heard it. Yeah. And the chaplain came around who visited a lot of people. And he was very curious about my practice. And we could talk a lot about theology. He said, well, what do you say? Living in a society like this, thinking about these 20 families that are connected in a small community where I'm sure that everybody in the community is affected.

[58:34]

He said, what is your message for a society that doesn't embrace a question mark as next? Like you just said in this talk, you know, can find it really frank and scary to even have a team as a possibility. How do we work with this society? How do we represent this question mark and not be, you know, maybe not meeting them at a time of need, or even crossing farm? That's a good question. When I did training in pastoral counseling, and I was at the Presbyterian Seminary, in San Francisco Theological Seminary, and so we did role-play situations. some tragedy happens and you show up and you're asked.

[59:37]

A lot of it has to do with your demeanor. Can I be present? Can I meet this person? It may be helpful to have some words. It may be helpful to sometimes say, we have, as Suzuki Roshi said, we have deep confidence in true nature Buddha nature if people are saying as Bob Dylan said in the beginning here forget what the line is but the first line is God right God bless and keep you always so sometimes to say yeah may God bless you So this is boundless compassion.

[60:42]

It's not particularly, I say, limited to some rigid language, you know, limitations. But it's more, can I be present? So I think one of the reasons that Zen Hospice has been so successful is that people who have done training in sitting, are willing to be present with people dying without an agenda, without thinking that this person has to do this or that to get right with God or something. But simply be present with them in whatever place they're in turns out to be a great comfort. So to be willing to be present without answers takes more courage than having answers.

[61:49]

And there's something about that that is quite trustworthy and reassuring. If you're honest, you know. So each person here has to come to terms with, how can I be fully present without answers? Any answer, of course, we do have many answers. Here I am answering. And at the same time, these are all tentative expressions. in the profound place of sitting, being a sitting Buddha, hour after hour, day after day, knowing that anything that you hold on to with your conceptual mind is unreliable. When you know that, completely face that, are willing to be awake with that.

[63:01]

facing impermanence like that, then you know that you are actually supported inconceivably. This life is a gift, as I say over and over again. So each moment of it is being supported inconceivably. Amazingly enough, you know, we're being supported by Andromeda Galaxy. How about that? Without Andromeda Galaxy being right where it is, without people in Africa and China being exactly where they are right now, we can't be here. This really is one completely interconnected

[64:03]

arising. It is, as we say, unfathomable. And so we accept it with respect and gratitude. So to actually understand that, then you can bring it to situations of great distress and find an appropriate response. I apologize for my long answer. Thank you. So maybe that's enough. So we will continue. Sashin, and tonight it would be great to sit yaza. Night sitting. Your last chance.

[65:05]

Enlightenment guaranteed. Thank you. Thank you for listening to this podcast offered by the San Francisco Zen Center. Our Dharma talks are offered free of charge and this is made possible by the donations we receive. Your financial support helps us to continue to offer the Dharma. For more information, visit SSCC.org and click giving.

[65:35]

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