As I was walking from the abbot's cabin at the retreat hall, I was thinking about the last community meeting we had with regards to the latest details of the fire risk. And I was thinking of all the community meetings we've had since mid-march. Each one, its own drawing, its own intensity, its own description of reality and our responses to it. I had the thought practice period towards the end of March or did it begin towards the end of March?

[01:11]

The way in which heightening or making moralize the request to be alive, live with what's happening, be present for what's happening. I have a comment from Stuart where someone quoted. He said, oh, you should be prepared if you stay. You sometimes have to run quickly. You know, usually when we're preparing for fire, we say, move at a steady pace. Don't get overwhelmed. But maybe we also need to be prepared very quickly.

[02:18]

What I'm trying to say is life's amazing. It just keeps unfolding. And I would say our Zen practice is Just meet as it unfolds. Here's today's weather. Here's today's drama. Here's today's sweetness. How much of that is conjured up from inside our own heads. How much of that is the product of global warming. and decided to cook for breakfast. One way we can think about Zazen, or Zen, is to think that everything is an instruction, a Zazen instruction.

[03:38]

We're sitting on our cushion, arises how is it experienced what is it to relate to just this being just this and then another way we can think about Zen practice is we take something that's realized in Zazan below our thinking and we bring it to everything that life presents especially in Japanese and there's a couple of concepts actually there are two concepts intertwined one is Moshin and the other one is U-shin the U is the

[04:43]

affirmation and the Mu, as most of us are familiar with, is the negation. One way to think about it is, if we want to experience things as they are, as they're presenting themselves, as they're coming into being, we have to let go of something. We have to let go of a fixation on the narrative that's playing in our head. Maybe this, since this is so utterly difficult for us, or challenging, maybe this is what's first called in the Momokan. Set up by that odd Does a dog have Buddha nature?

[05:46]

What is it to meet the moment? Does anything, does any moment have Buddha nature? What is it to meet the moment? What is it to be present? What is to be present when you ask yourself? Well, should I stay here? Should I leave? Should I endorse my concerns? Is that the voice of wisdom? Should I be open to whatever happens next and trust that what we did appropriate response. Is that the voice of wisdom? Emotion it says, just as it is.

[07:00]

This is the experience of the moment. Even though it could implicate global warming. currentness, all sorts of things. It's just the arising of the moment. Like that mysterious vibe that happened a moment ago. The monk asked your shoulders. complicated question. What is the nature of Buddha nature? And Joshua says, no.

[08:03]

Let go of that too. And then something appears. And the perplexity of it, when we turn it into ideas, is what appears is what's already happening. Maybe as you were listening to Goyal describe the concerns and considerations of going or staying, maybe in your mind, in your heart, You're not ready to side in one way or the other. It'll be fine. I'm going to stay. It'll be terrible.

[09:05]

I don't trust that everything will work out. I'm leaving. dismissing it without grasping it cannot be met as bullshit. Just this. This is what's coming up. This is the calling of my life presenting itself right now. In some ways I think we're very fortunate to have had this period of time Since the end of our formal practice period. You know usually we read. Impermanence. Not knowing. Now we think. Of course. For the last couple of months. We've been obliged to live in.

[10:15]

How have you done? Has your mind searched out something you can rely upon? Two more days and then it's personal day. The reassurance of familiarity over it. And then personal day, I'll do this. I'll hide to the real sicker. Or has something been eating away at you? Is this okay? Should I be staying here?

[11:18]

I'm really neglecting something important. I'm admitting to myself the uncertainties of all this. Mushen doesn't dictate any conclusion. Just like Zazen's mind doesn't dictate any conclusion. Just as the Jewish view doesn't dictate any conclusion for the monk. What is the nature of Buddha nature? Don't get stuck in that either. In the Usha, everything, every moment,

[12:27]

is vitally alive. I think of the way we go round the room with those community meetings. And my experience was the authority, the beauty of people speaking from their heart. Even when one person was Emphasizing, you know, we should do everything for the world. Another person is emphasizing. Zazen is inconceibly beneficial for all beings. No contradiction. No need to decide who's right and who's wrong. Bushed allows ocean, the particularity of the expression of existence, to just have the authority of being itself.

[13:42]

Here's what we are. Here's what we're dealing with. You're having the thoughts, the feelings that you're having. born from your karmic being. It doesn't make you a good person or a bad person. It just acknowledges your karmic existence. Ushi. In zazen, whether seated, whether in a community meeting, any other part of our life just says experience the experience being experienced okay that was my warm up to the parameters especially from a Mahayana

[15:04]

point of view. The parameters are an acceptance of the vulnerability of the human condition. It is not our tendency to just simply flow in the interplay of Mushin and Goshin. Even after we hear ourselves chant, there is no northern or southern school. It's emerging of difference and unity. human condition, our conditioning, karma that brought us here and that keeps rattling around within us as we're here.

[16:14]

In practical terms, it asks to be addressed. It's challenging us. Can you be skillful with your own stuff? from saying, can you stop being yourself? See this way you could hope to, you could stop, stop being that, be something else. Can you be skillful with it? Can you learn from it? One of the interesting things is As you learn from your own karma disposition, you start to see it not only in yourself, but in others. Ah. Well, that's not how I get impatient, but I do have my way of being impatient.

[17:24]

I do have my way. opening to the courage of generosity and closing to the fear of scarcity. I have a way of expressing the diligence of Shiva. And then I have a way of neglected. So, I am going to... I'll figure a few more out.

[18:32]

in terms of reflections or the parameters and I'll leave these here and I would encourage you especially as we move more into the fire season one thing I find in my own life is that it's a great support if you could train yourself Support yourself. That no matter what's going on, it's something to practice with. And what's that about? What am I thinking and feeling? What am I telling you to get stuck? And what would it be to be skillful with that? something on the vow of practice says that inquiry we hold it no matter what something fabulously wonderful happens in your life what is it to practice with that if you hear someone

[20:10]

quote Stuart Carlson saying, and know that you may have on some occasion to run fast in terms of in relationship to fire. You know, I can't help but say, I'm not so sure that's going to be asked of you. Probably more will be the fireworks that say to you, do it at a steady pace. Don't let the adrenaline turn into a manic response. But be it as it may. What is it to practice? will have a ceremony, you know, into the Buddha, as I can talk to them.

[21:24]

And the ordinance will be asked, will you? And hopefully they'll respond, yes I will. And then they'll be asked again, and again, and again. with you even after attaining Buddhahood. Even though you're exactly who you are and what you are, would you continue to practice? Yes, I would. The Paramitas was offer a suggestion. And then in my own foolishness, I took the Targnitas and offered reflections like this.

[22:38]

During the comment week, Look for opportunities to be generous. Maybe to the whole group. Maybe to an individual. Maybe abstractly. Just wishing well for everyone. And know how it affects you. Know how it affects you and know how it affects how you're looking to others. you might think of when you do that material would you do that with kind of speech would you do that just with the sensibility each day have thoughts of the well-being of others

[23:52]

Like something sick. That part of you, it's inclined towards lacking. That part of you, it's inclined towards almost abstract oppression. I'm being oppressed. that feels like that life demands a certain kind of assertion or even aggression. Sometimes we have those subtle influences on a deeper level. engage a certain kind of well-being alchemy sometimes we offer it to others to learn how to offer it to ourselves

[25:29]

always might see, oh this doesn't carry that, the marvellous nodulity of the Zen way. There's a subtle picking in terms, this mental state is better than that mental state. critique. And actually, it's a more subtle discernment. But the practical truth is, when we're stuck, when we're habituated on a fixed response, a fixed way of seeing things,

[26:43]

Our engaging is narrow. And this softening and opening will widen the perspective. And quite naturally, the non-luticalism of it arises. Quite naturally, we just reflect on the community meeting. savor the particulars. I have an image of Tim Rehm sitting over there in his wonderful bodhisattva way of saying, and we should make masks for

[27:49]

everybody and give them all the way to the whole world. And then someone else over here is saying, inconceivable virtue observes it. With wide-minded, They're both beautiful. They're both expressions of abundance of the Dharma. This is the paramita of generosity in action. we being blessed or are we being cursed by this ever-changing set of circumstances?

[29:13]

When we were starting that before lecture chant, I thought, now shall we do the full thing or shall we stick with what we did last time because we're listening to a recording? How lovely. Can I and just fall into routine in mechanical way with gift to the parameters like this And then sila, that which, the behavior that stimulates and supports practice.

[30:19]

What arises your dedication? And does that differ from what you tell yourself you should do? That way. Something comes up in your heart. Yes, I will. It's heartfelt. In contrast to, yes, I should. Yeah, if I was a good person, I would be doing that. I should do that. But that's still mind and heart.

[31:38]

is it that keeps you returning to your cushion? What is it that keeps you engaged in being present? Is mindfulness what receives the gift of presence? Or is it the virtuous activity that you should be doing? What supports your physical and mental vitality? What supports that presence? And how would that guide, that consideration guide your practice, your behavior.

[32:49]

How do you encourage yourself within your practice? To sustain and nourish the vow of practice. both of these, to recall both dhana and Shiva, generosity, diligence and practice, with both of them to recall what was it like when I was really infused with that, when I was filled with that, whether it be was it like in the moments when I wasn't? It's almost like the opposite.

[33:59]

It has its own non-dualism. To hold them both helps us to not just think, oh yes, and I should always be like that. You will be what you'll be. There isn't a single period of Zazen that you will sit where you will know exactly and completely what's going to arise. Every period of Zazen will call forth Mushin and Mushin. arabitas are there to help us with that. So I will I will leave my musics on the arabitas and

[35:28]

Just the reflections and practices. In case you're curious enough to try on these practices. But I'd say this about them, you know, my own reflections and practices. They don't offer you a whole lot intellectually. be kind, doesn't require a whole lot of thinking about what does that mean. But when you get into the activity of it, when it helps you engage the workings of the self, that's when it becomes intriguing and rich. And when it helps us engage the workings of the self,

[36:31]

That's where we discover the paths of liberation. Shakyamuni supposedly said, I teach support the causes of suffering and liberation of suffering. Just that I would suggest to you is what brought us here and what we are. That's the heart of what we're doing. Not to say the many wonderful teachings that have arisen over two and a half thousand years aren't a great help

[37:35]

elucidation yeah but the heart of it as we engage it that's where this we start to discover the alchemy of relating to the human condition you know liberating what and this is what the paramitas are attempting to do And I would suggest to you that the non-dualism of our tradition, going beyond right and wrong, success and failure, will keep us on a steady course as we open up and engage the workings of the self. For myself, many times I find myself reflecting, oh, this great adventure called being alive.

[39:03]

How much I learned from that experience, and I hope it never happens again. That way, then it manifests in Buddhism, equanimity becomes the capstone, the final consequence. And in a way, The parameters are just the same. And we could all use some help. We could all use the skillfulness of engaging the human condition.

[40:11]

And we could use each other's help. From the vulnerability of the human condition. How do we create an environment that we can trust? That supports us to look at our own past suffering and the lingering consequences of it. How do we support a collective patience? We don't know how the next months, two months, three months are going to unfold. Can we be patient with that?

[41:19]

Can we let that nature of what it's

[41:30]

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